It was yesterday morning (like this) after a failed attempt to wake up early to go running with someone(well aint that about a bitch?), i go outside for some of that fresh air/morning residue, then my neighbor across the street shows up and starts talking to me about how he was scared that his dog might die from some sort of burn sore or whatever the fuck it was a disease or some shit he thought. Thats when he really started telling me what had been going down on my street since i first moved in here when i was a weee kid and from that he progressed to his educational major *some shit with computers and i heard programming too* later working for cheveron i think. on retirement , Cheveron gave him a retirement package. 100k plus his shit load savings and pension(?) i still dont know wtf that is but he took it at the right time cuz his wife was just about to graduate SF state and so now he could pay off all them damn student loans and what not. Eventually we went back into our separate homes. i took a big ass nap and decided to play some cod MW2, then when evening came, one of my fat Italian friends hits me up texting me yo man did you know “that rave was tonight if you trying to go” im like fersho. nigga ended up flakin. so anyways to get my mind off other things (that are not healthy to give a shit about) and to also say ‘ay its cool bro next time’ (too bad there wont be a next time) so yeah i was okay with not being able to go but they wanted me to drive all the way to oakland and in my head im like “AHAHAHA-NOPEEEEEE-NIGGA” (Thats when i responded to earlier texts sayin we gone gym tonight) OKAY BACK ON TOPIC to get my mind off drama: i sorta volenteered to pick up and drop off 2 pills he had ordered (technically another fatass bought it for him, he just faded for two) by practicing with my stick-shift driving car. No i did not crash or get caught up in some bullshit (lmao) but i get this text message from ******* ******** asking me to meet up at some park “its important”  she says…  the look in her eyes that came at me were way more of a devastating expression. prolly more worse than when she’d seen a ghost.  When i heard the very words that struck me by surprise/ disbelief/realization/idk what, tf to say but i later thought…

“Wow, like wtf wow, this shit is really happening ALL around my small time life. I have no fucks to pay right now cuz ive been told the best thing to do is just enjoy whats out there for me. Lets face it nobodies trying stay sad @ home”

This seems to me to be the most dominating motto as a result of “separations”

 Its sad cuz i really believed in those two.